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About that clothing fast

socks

About that clothing fast? I’m really glad I made an exception for socks. This is now the second pair of socks my big toes have demolished in a three week period.

You see the little nail popping out there? It’s a little black still. Actually it’s more than a little black. It looks better than it did a couple weeks ago, but it’s not pretty either.

clothes3To be fair, these socks are about a year old. I don’t replace them as regularly as they tell me to at my local running store, but at $12 a pair they are really expensive. I only spend about $1 a pair on my regular socks at Target. I’m nowhere near fancy.

I’m now used to the questions I get asked about why I buy “special” clothes for running. Why the socks? Why the capris? Why the shirts? Why bother at all?

After a disastrous half marathon where my feet were rubbed raw from a bad pair of non-running socks, I decided it wasn’t worth the pain anymore. I had never owned running socks prior to that. I figured my $1 Target socks were decent enough to push me through a run. Nope.

Now I need a new pair. These ones will get stitched up and used for everyday wear. (I can’t use them for running once I sew them. They tend to bunch up in the toe and can cause more pain, especially in feet prone to black toenails, like me.)

It looks like I’ll be in the market for some running socks.

Making everyday recipes low fat

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I’m trying to really make better choices since my gallbladder removal, especially when it comes to consumption of many of my favorite foods. One that I love more than anything else? Cheese.

Cheese is always one of the things I told to consider cutting out completely.

The problem is that my husband can eat whatever he wants to. But I’m the one who cooks. So I have to make things for dinner that we both like.

As I was recuperating from surgery, I spent a lot of time on Pinterest. I don’t think I ever let my iPad go unless I was sleeping, which happened quite often as well. It was there I came across a recipe for a rolled chicken-bake like creation.

If you live near a Costco, you know the allure of a chicken bake. My husband loves them. I forgot to pin it, though, after I found it. So I tried to recreate it from memory, but with some low fat and fat free substitutes.

Ingredients

  • Two chicken breasts
  • 1 packet Hidden Valley Ranch dry mix
  • 1 cup low fat mozzarella cheese
  • 1 package fat free cream cheese
  • 1 cylinder pre-made pizza dough
  • Fat free cooking oil

Instructions

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1. Start by frying the chicken with a fat free cooking oil. Add 1/4 of the ranch mix for seasoning. Move the chicken off the stove, let cool down.

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2. Put the cream cheese and mozzarella into a bowl, mix in with 1/2 pack of the ranch dry mix. Set aside. Preheat oven at 400 degrees.

3. Open dough, spread out on a 13-by-9-inch pan in the shape of a rectangle.

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4. Mix the chicken into the cream cheese and mozzarella.

5. Spread the chicken mixture along the center of the dough.

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6. Roll the dough over the chicken mixture, making sure to pinch the ends so that the chicken mixture doesn’t come out.

7. Put roll in the oven for 20 minutes (this may change depending on the oven, my oven runs hot so it didn’t take 20 minutes).

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8. Let cool. Cut in slices and serve. The ends will likely be a little more bulked up, so you can either cut the loaf in half and split the two separate  pieces or cut in smaller slices, serving the two end pieces a little larger than the rest.

The verdict? My husband loved it. He’s planning on taking the rest of it to work tomorrow for lunch.

Plus, he didn’t really notice the difference in taste from regular to low fat.

I have a great recipe for homemade pizza crust that I have from a recipe book from one of our favorite wineries, I’m hoping to try it with as well. I think next time I won’t put so much of the dry ranch dressing into the cream cheese mixture (which is why I said only about 1/2 the packet), so that it doesn’t taste as “ranchy” as I thought it did.

I don’t know exact calories, but I know it doesn’t taste as dense as the Costco chicken bakes. In fact, it actually isn’t all that bad on my newly sensitive stomach.

The season for trimming down

January is the month when people take their resolutions far more seriously than they do any other month. I know. I’ve made and broken a lot of New Year’s resolutions in the first month of the year.

It’s also the year when big-box stores put all the workout equipment front and center. Plus, there are usually great deals to be had.

On Saturday, my husband and I visited our local Sears store. He needed to buy a nail gun so we could finish putting new baseboards in our bedroom, thereby finishing the epic master suite renovation of 2013. (We have nice vaulted ceilings which are great in general, but a pain to paint.) Our home is 20-years old and likely hasn’t been painted for the last 10, so the paint job was much needed.

My favorite part about Sears? The treadmills and workout stuff are right next to the tools.

That’s where I found a toning loop set for $11.37, tax included.

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It event comes with a workout DVD. I actually have a qualm with that. I’m spoiled maybe, but I’d rather not collect more DVDs in my house. I’m big on getting rid of clutter. I’m always throwing bags upon bags of stuff I consider garbage away. Can’t we get an Internet video link NordicTrack? Just saying. End rant.

I’ve been looking for a set of these to work my inner thighs and arms, places that often get neglected when I run.

So my husband bought a nail gun. I bought toning bands.

We completed two separate purchases, because I paid cash, and were talking the whole time my husband was in line before me.

“Do you know that man?” the associate asked me when I got up to the register.

“He’s my husband,” I said.

The associate gave me a funny look, then looked at my husband, then at me. Then he asked if I wanted to use Thomas’ reward card.

“Sure,” I said.

“Do you know his phone number,” the associate asked.

I wanted to say: “No, we’ve only been married for nearly five years and together 11, but I don’t know his phone number. In fact, I wouldn’t know what he looked like if he hadn’t have come to the house we jointly own for the first time last night just to introduce himself.”

I didn’t. But that’s the sort of thing that goes through my head when people ask me questions like that.

The biggest deal I saw with all the NordicTrack-related fitness gear was for a 3-in-1 roller set. I paid $45 for my Grid roller. I paid another $25 for my Stick roller. Then I paid $25 for my Tiger Tail, which is my favorite of the three. Altogether they cost me nearly $100.

Then I saw this:

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Shut up.

Sometimes I hate myself for over thinking things. Wow. I could have paid less than $30 for nearly all those things. They have this bad boy at Sears.com too. That set also includes an instructional DVD. (Or you can go to YouTube and search “foam roller” and find some iPad friendly tutorials.)

I actually checked out the rollers. They aren’t pool noodles. Add a little Duct Tape to those and you have yourself a not-so-fancy roller, but with not as much support as you’d probably get with a more expensive, not-homemade one.

Also on sale? Medicine balls. Weights. Jump ropes.

Lots of stuff to help you trim down.

I have to be honest: I only visit that area because in the likely decline of my treadmill, which will happen sooner rather than later, I’m hoping I know what to pick up immediately when I need to buy a new one. That said, I’m hoping my $800 NordicTrack has a few more years of life left in it, especially since I maintenance it myself now, lube and all.

True story: I used $500 I won in a graduate-school journalism competition toward my treadmill. Most people would have bought a video camera or something, especially me since I love shooting video. Nope. I bought a treadmill.

This is going to be harder than I thought

I’ve run all of six miles since I got cleared to officially run. Six miles. And the first two were slow-as-molasses miles. I’m talking 12-minute mile zone. That’s usually my warm-up pace for the first half mile.

Yesterday, it was a nice comfort zone that took me two miles to break out of.

Let me explain.

Today, I was supposed to pumping out a record-fast 10K at the 2013 version of this race:

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Instead, I’m trying to find my balance again running, literally.

A week ago, after looking at my half marathon plans for Feb. 17 I realized most of my workouts were going to be treadmill activities. Not because I’m so in love with my treadmill I don’t want to leave the house. It’s because I’m still having some balance issues from the gallbladder removal surgery.

My surgeon said the issues will go away within a month. And while I could just say “oh well, no running for a month,” I can’t do that if I am really adamant about running Rock ‘n’ Roll Pasadena.

To be fair, anyone can walk/run a half without a ton of training. I want to do better than I did last year.

Basically if I get deep into a run, I start to feel as if my head is spinning. Then I wobble a little bit. Then my balance goes right out the window. It sounds really dangerous, yes. You’re thinking: “WHY THE HELL ARE YOU RUNNING?”

I sound naive, but it’s not as bad now as it was on Monday when I ran four miles. I’m hoping if I hit the treadmill today it would be as bad as it was yesterday. It will wear off, I was assured. So when I hopped on the treadmill for my six-mile run yesterday, I spent 24 minutes over two miles making sure I didn’t lose my balance.

I also ran later in the day.

Being without the dread of my full-time job means I can be creative again (not even kidding). It also means I can take on freelance assignments. I’m lucky enough to have a friend I greatly admire, who is sending some awesome coding/web building assignments my way. So I woke up at 7 a.m. Friday, put on my running clothes and then proceeding to alter alter CSS for five hours before deciding it was time to run. (My husband probably shouldn’t know that.) The good news is, the website I’m working on is starting to look like the mocks up. And I ran with only one short dizzy spell.

I WANT to be ready for Pasadena. I WANT to do better than last year. But right now I’m having some serious doubts in my capabilities to run a half. That gives me serious doubts in running the April 7 marathon too. (I hate even writing that because I’ve already paid for it, we already know we are going and I know I WANT to do that race too.)

Maybe this is still the post-operative fog talking. After a similar surgery in 2010, I only took a week off work. I ended up taking nearly six weeks off running. I don’t want to do that again. That was also a planned surgery. The gallbladder removal was an emergency. I can’t imagine what I’d be feeling, the back and forth thoughts and all, if it had happened closer to the Oakland Half Marathon, closer to the San Luis Obispo Marathon. I’d be devastated.

Right now? I’m mildly disappointed. I don’t think I’ve ever written a letter as sad for me as the one I did to the Brazen race director two weeks ago. I really just wanted to be there today. And not sitting at home wondering what might have been if my gallbladder had decided not to, for lack of better visual, explode on me.

Guess who got cleared to run?

That would be ME!

Today marked two things: I was released from medical leave, thereby could officially end my employment. I’m relieved. I felt like I was waiting to bury someone. Those of you who know what it’s like between a death and the funeral know what I mean.

And I was told I can resume all normal athletic or exercise activities, which means I’m going to be busting my butt for the next three weeks to train for the Rock ‘n’ Roll Pasadena Half Marathon.

To be fair, I’ve run nine miles in the past two days, but always slow and always against medical advice. Now that I know I’ve “healed nicely” I can beat my little legs into the ground again. Words cannot describe how incredibly excited I am to run again.

Stupid gallbladder removal. No more delaying my training.

Introducing ‘The Great Clothes Fast’

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I have a confession: I have more running clothes than I absolutely need. It’s a bit of a nasty habit of mine, to purchase more running clothes each time I get paid. Or to covet something on the Lululemon website for weeks until I finally buckle and buy it.

With the absence of one job, I’ve decided that it’s time to put a halt on buying running clothes.

I need to live more simply. Simple is not nearly 15 pairs of running capris. Or 30-plus tops. Or more long sleeves than I even wear. Add on numerous pairs of shots, which I rarely wear even during the summer and my closest is kind of complete for now.

clothes3So I’m not buying any running clothes for at least six months.

That’s right. Starting today, no new running clothes, with a couple exceptions, for six months.

That’s all the way until July 18. That’s after two marathons and a series of other races.

Ask my husband, for me that’s a lot of time. It means I won’t be jumping on any awesome Nike sales, so trying to find a coupon code that doesn’t exist for Lululemon (seriously, they never have codes or anything that would make the clothes less expensive.)

I am putting some rules on this experiment, though:

  1. Shoes are not considered “clothing” objects and can, therefore, be purchased as they are now (three times a year)
  2. Shirts that are part of race fees do not count, because I’ve already paid for them
  3. Pre-existing clothes can be altered and fixed in order to make it through the six months
  4. Socks can be purchased as needed, if only to avoid foot chafing
  5. If I’m running a race for the first time, I can browse for one new object and potentially buy, but only if I have cash on hand and am not using a credit card
  6. Expos, where much money can be spent, will now have a budget based on how much money I have in savings, again avoiding frivolous use of credits cards
  7. After the six months is over, I will not buy new running clothes until something wears out, splits a seam or has a hole

Those are my rules. My husband has helped me develop them, if only because he knows how weak I am when it comes to Lululemon. But I also know I have a closet so full of clothes (all clothes, not just running clothes) that I have no space for my workout gear. It sits on the floor right inside of the sliding door.

But I’m facing it: I have a lot of clothes.

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That’s part of my pile of short-sleeve shirts inside the closet. I have nearly every color you can thing of. I even own a running skirt, which I love in theory but my fat little legs don’t necessary like it too much.

I’m not as crazy as replacing my accessories. My iFitness band is getting more worn than I’d like, but I love it. Since last summer, when I switched to Nike LunarEclipses, I’ve held on to my shoes until they are falling apart. In fact, I run on my treadmill with my original pair of the LunarEclipses. They still feel good, so I’m not getting rid of them. (I also wear them as my regular, every day shoes.)

So this begins “The Great Clothes Fast” where I give up my obsession with purchasing every pair of capris I love in a store and every shirt that looks nice on the model, even if it won’t look nice on me.

I’m planning on updating my progress on this, as I put together outfits from my stock of gear. I’m crossing my fingers than I can do this. If anything, at least my husband will hold my accountable.

Lessons in anatomy and physiology

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Do you know how hard it is to find a picture of a gallbladder on Wikimedia Commons? They are all ultrasound images. All kind of lame. I found a nice anatomy/physiology class look at the whole body, though, that seems to fit the purpose.

Let’s talk gallbladders.

There are three organs deemed “non existential” to the maintaining of life. We’ve all heard horror stories of people having their appendixes removed, usually with dramatic stories about it happening before high school graduation or grad night or, this one is real, I know someone who had her appendix removed a week before her wedding. She always says that’s the only reason she could fit into her dress.

Then there’s the spleen. The only people I know who have had theirs removed are people who have been in serious accidents.

Until last week, I wasn’t even aware my gallbladder could be what was causing me so many intestinal problems.

Now it makes sense.

Let’s backtrack.

The pain I’d been experiencing had been diagnosed as everything from “female troubles” to kidney stones to a “physical manifestation of stress.” I nearly kicked the doctor who diagnosed the latter of the three. Wow. If only stress could manifest as a removal appendage instead and we could just remove it from our lives.

In the last four months, as other craziness was going on in my life, it became considerably worse. I scaled back my food intake to get a little control over it. But I still had bowel issues (sorry, TMI, but necessary) and couldn’t drop a single pound on the scale. Something was up. Now that I look back at it, as my pain increased over the past couple years, the pounds stacked back on.

And I wasn’t eating bad. My husband joked that on paper, he is healthier than me. But what people don’t see is that I run 30-plus miles a week, eat healthy and take incredibly good care of myself. When I have pain, I know whether it’s expected or weird.

I’m still a little set back by the fact that my gallbladder was removed just a week ago.

But I’m learning to work within a new reality. Why? Because you can live without a gallbladder, but it does serve a vital body function.

The gallbladder holds bile. It rests under the liver. When we eat, it releases bile to the intestines to help with the moving of food and absorption. That’s why doctors introduce a liquid diet initially. Lots of Jello. Lots of broth. I’ve been gradually increasing my food intake.

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It started out with lots of soup. This is a homemade chicken bow-tie soup that I made the other night. My husband says that he’ll eat anything I put on the table, so this was the first of a series of challenges I’m putting him up to. It passed. All he added was pepper. I can’t handle a lot of salt and pepper.

The problem is that a week after surgery, I’m still lacking an appetite. I’m eating. But not much. And everything I am eating is as much as I was before. My husband and I talked about my diet last night, as we realized a couple things:

– I haven’t started taking any of the medication I was on prior to surgery (and I mean ALL medication outside of the pain meds)

– I’ve stopped drinking Diet Coke for the time being because I was told my stomach probably couldn’t handle the carbonation.

– I’ve prepared nearly every meal or had soup since leaving the hospital

– I haven’t ran all but a mile, and it was slightly disastrous and I nearly threw up doing it

Today, I weighed myself and I’m six pounds less than I did before surgery. I’m not sure if that’s because of surgery and a hospital stay, which usually happens. But my calorie consumption has gone down too.

I’ve been trying out new recipes that are low-fat or no fat based.

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I made a simple pizza, sans sauce. I used a French-bread crust, spread it out. I used low-fat mozzarella cheese, no fat cooking spray, sliced tomatoes and a little bit of basil. I also used some low-fat Parmesan cheese for taste. My husband loved it and it only took 20 minutes from prep to table.

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I have some leftovers I’m planning on warming up today, in the oven instead of the microwave. It will be nice to have a little crunch. I haven’t gone as far as figuring out the calories for something like this, but it treated my stomach well. I had a couple little slices (it’s not a big pizza).

And so far my stomach is handling things decently. I think over the next couple weeks it will be really a “try and see” thing. Because my gallbladder isn’t stockpiling bile, sometimes too much fat is released. Then I have some stomach cramps and other issues that may or may not involve me running to the bathroom.

Another new addition to my diet is soy-based products.

I bought Boca chicken burgers. which have been relatively easy on my stomach as well.

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Except I eat them as sandwiches, with low-fat cheese. And it tastes so good. This is one new food item my husband won’t be partaking in. I went to Berkeley for graduate school. I own Birkenstocks. He already tells me I’m a hippie. Eating anything Boca related doesn’t help, believe me.

So a week out, I’m relearning how to eat. I’m also dealing with very little appetite and other issues.

On a running note, I finally sent the email to the race director admitting I probably wouldn’t be able to run in the 10K next week. I figured I’d be feeling a lot better by now, but I’m still dozing off in the afternoon when my head starts to hurt. If I try to do too much, I end up having moments where I’m dizzy. If I want to drive, I can’t take my pain pills. So I’m kind of a mess still.

But my running buddy Sam scolded me for even thinking about running. She reminded me that we had a trip to Pasadena planned for next month. And it should likely now be my first race for 2013.

Today, in video

I’ve quoted this song before, probably more than I think on the blog. Today it’s more relevant. More personal.

“Regrets collect like old friends

Here to relive your darkest moments

I can see no way, I can see no way

And all of the ghouls come out to play

And every demon wants his pound of flesh

But I like to keep some things to myself…”

Today the news was bad, what I am hoping is the end of four months of bad. All bad.

Today, I’m not letting it ruin me. I’m dancing again. A little lighter.

The crying is hopefully over. The worry is gone.

“I am done with my graceless heart

So tonight I’m gonna cut it out and then restart…

And that’s exactly what I’m going to do tonight. With one less job. With more hope. And a semester’s worth of planning for my class derailed by the missing gallbladder to do.

Today, I’m smiling for the first time in a long time. Because even bad news bring new possibility.

Getting through the post-operative fog

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The past couple days, when I try to take photos, they mostly look like the image above. Actually, a lot of things look like the image above.

I’ve been doing something fancy Google searching only to find out about all the post-operative side effects that come along with having general anesthesia.

Because this isn’t pain induced. I’m kind of past the pain today. Or at least I haven’t been taking my medications that leave me even more tired and loopy than I am right now. Though this morning was pretty epic when I congratulated myself for finally being able to wear real clothes (hello jeans! hello actual shirt!), then promptly fell asleep on my couch for what is like the umpteenth time.

So lame.

The good news is that I’ve been able to wear real clothes all day without pain.

The bad news is that I’m still suffering the side effects of being put under, much worse than the last time I had surgery in 2010.

I stand up and have dizzy spells. I can’t stay awake for more than four or five hours at a time. Then, for some reason, it takes me forever to fall asleep. Then I’m stuck in this great semi-somnia where I feel awake and can sense everything around me, but feel kind of paralyzed. Weird stuff is going on up in this body.

It may surprise then that when I woke up this morning I said “oh hey, maybe since I’m not in horrible pain anymore, I can actually run on the treadmill.” Then I stood up and realized the room was spinning. And my ears were doing this weird throbbing thing.

I’m pretty sure I’d be a disaster in my running shoes right now.

But I can’t help but feel a great need to get back to running as soon as possible. I haven’t even sent an email to the race director of the upcoming race because I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe, I can run the 10K. It will be alright, yes?

I’m probably so wrong.

I’m barely eating solid foods.

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But I’m taking down a lot of soup. My mother in law made the bowl above. She actually made enough for two, but I made my husband eat his fatty chicken strips from the night before. (That’s what he gets for eating in front of me. The chicken smelled so good I wanted to grab the strip right from his hand.)

Since I can’t drive until I am done with my pain pills, I asked him if he could take me to the store yesterday. I had to throw away most of what was in our pantry because it’s not exactly considering healthy or low fat by any means.

“We need food,” I said.

He gave me this look that bordered between sympathy and annoyance.

But he took me. Since I had a $10 off $50 coupon at Winco, he went there. Speaking of coupons, when I got to the register the clerk nearly freaked out when she saw I had about 10 other coupons to use.

She actually said “Oh Lord!” like I was one of those crazy coupon ladies who was going to get my grocery bill down to $1.50 or something like that. Yeah, we only saved $14.40.

We spent an hour in the store, picking up lots of fruits and vegetables (my snack staples). We also grabbed chicken and pork chops, to supplement the ground beef and stew meat we already have. We made a pact: no grocery shopping for two weeks. Instead, we need to eat everything in our pantry and refrigerator. The only thing I’d buy is fruits. Those seem to go pretty quickly.

My husband and I haven’t shopped together in a long time. The last time was probably before I started working two jobs. It was nice, if only because I’m not supposed to push the cart.

But the fog followed me to the store too, where the lights seemed to be screaming at me. I nearly fell over a couple times. If it hadn’t been for the shopping cart, I probably would have fallen in an aisle and had cans all over me.

Our mission to get low-fat and non-fat foods was a success, though.

We came home with a lot of good food and a meal plan.

So as much as I think I’m feeling better, I’m still realizing that this whole gallbladder episode was bigger than even I could imagine. I still have sterile-strips across the four holes in my abdomen. I’m supposed to wait until they “fall off” in the shower. I’m also supposed to call Monday and make a follow-up appointment with my surgeon to make sure everything is healing okay.

And yet, all I can think about is putting my Nikes back on and hitting the road.

My (somewhat) daily diet

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First thing: I’m very grateful for the thoughts, sentiments and such I’ve received through email. This hasn’t exactly been the easiest week of my life. And I think it’s awesome that people I don’t even know personally choose to reach out.

Second: I’ve been asked about what my diet is typically like on a day-to-day basis.

It’s a good question, especially considering that the gallstone my doctor found was incredibly huge.

So what does a typical, not splurging at Boudin day, look like for me? It’s pretty basic.

Breakfast

– Banana

– 100 calorie Grek yogurt

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Lunch

– Weight Watchers or Lean Cuisine meal

– Or a peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread

– Or a quick, small salad

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Snack options (Usually two or three during the day)

– Simply Fruit Rolls or sticks

– Granola bar

– Banana

– Golden Delicious apple

– Wheat thins

– Sugar Free Jello

– Another Greek yogurt

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Dinner

If I’m alone…

– Progresso Light Soup

– Sushi (Because my husband hates sushi, so if I’m alone this is the only time I can actually eat sushi)

– Weight Watchers or Lean Cuisine meal

If my husband is around…

– Chicken breast

– Side vegetable, usually corn, but sometimes zucchini

– Potatoes, pasta or some other starch

Doesn’t seem too bad, right?

My problem is overeating. If I make potatoes au gratin, I’m only really supposed to eat about a cup full. But, unfortunately, I have to eat more than that. I usually go back for seconds and thirds without hesitation.

Or when I eat chips, I grab more than the handful I am supposed to. I can’t seem to control it very well.

Is that what let to the gallstone and gallbladder issues? Maybe. Who knows. I’ve been dealing with these pains since a long time before I gained a ton of weight. The first time I can remember having this pain, I was in high school. At that point, I was only 135 pounds.

But my issue has always been the overeating. I eat a lot of good stuff.

In fact, when my husband brought me home from the hospital he started searching around for the things I could eat. He found sugar free Jello and the soup and a bunch of low-fat foods. He didn’t need to go buy much at all.

So if I had been eating this stuff all along, why has my stomach hurt so bad lately?

I don’t know. But I went back and looked at recent posts where I complained about abdomen issues while running, I can say that it was likely the result of the gallbladder issues getting really, really severe. Two emergency room visits in two weeks? Yes, that should tell me something.

But now my diet is definitely more exclusive than inclusive.

So I’m cutting back even more so. But my diet will likely stay very, very similar. Now, though, it’s much more important to stay within portion limits and not overdo the fat.